I’ve been dealing with some health stuff all summer and now we finally know what it is; it’s endometriosis, babey! I didn’t have any symptoms and probably wouldn’t have found out about it if not for some abnormal bleeding. I’ve always thought endometriosis *had* to be painful, so I didn’t even consider the possibility of having it, but apparently there’s a minority of women who experience no or next to no pain and I am one of them. Anyway, I’m having surgery in September to remove the cysts that made my left ovary twice the size it’s supposed to be!

The bad thing is, endo has spread to both of my fallopian tubes and there’s a big chance they’ll have to go. Sad news for anyone hoping to conceive naturally, neutral news for me, a childfree woman who never intended to use my reproductive system at all. I’m still not thrilled about having to have parts of myself cut out so I do hope they can be salvaged, but if not… it’s fine. I'm even less thrilled about having to manage my hormones until menopause to prevent recurrence. Well. It is what it is. I just hope my insurance will cover at least some of it and that everything happens when it's supposed to with no delays.

My mental health hasn't improved since my last post either, I’m afraid. I've made a small moodboard of pictures that showcase how I'm feeling perfectly:

I actually feel like it may be time for me to stop rawdogging life and finally get back into therapy because it’s just been WAY too difficult to see reasons to be happy and find things to look forward to in the general bleakness. I’m doing better than most, I know, and I’m grateful for that, but it doesn’t help.

I did make a little list of things to look forward to, though!

I went to a collage workshop the other day and made this out of magazine cuttings! The workshop was summer-themed but we could do our own thing if we wanted to. I did use the theme for inspiration, but very loosely, haha. Rather than the usual things associated with this season, I was more inspired by the thoughts I had this summer, the feelings of apathy and hopelessness it always inspires in me and the general Vibe of taking a three-hour drive to the seaside every year.

One of the magazines we used at the workshop was a leftist publication from 2020 with articles in Russian, Ukrainian and English, and most of the material I used came from there. The red flag with the words “vulnerability and apathy” in Russian cursive, for example, came from an article about Russian art activism during the pandemic. The other Russian phrase says “your sacrifices were in vain” and it came from a photo of another art installation, this time by a Ukrainian artist. Was there really a time we could write about these things freely? Was it only five years ago that a magazine like this could exist and be distributed?

Oh well. Anyway. I took some scraps home with me and later tried making another collage *just* from those scraps. Am I in my collage era right now? :o I was just messing around and this was the result. The word at the bottom is “utopia”; I think this turned out to lowkey be a piece on digital surveillance.

Reading

I read a couple of books, but none I feel like writing about - except for The Art of Arkham Horror, the official Arkham Horror board game artbook. I love that game and its aesthetic so much – and I’m specifically talking about the second edition here, not the card game. I love the massive setup, the sessions that take all day, the giant rulebook you need to consult every five minutes… I haven’t played in years because my best friend aka my AH game partner, hasn’t been able to visit. I miss it terribly. It’s a cooperative game and it’s actually possible to play alone, and I did try once, but it’s not the same. I think there are, or at least were, AH game nights in one of my city’s board game clubs, but I can’t just go and play with people I don’t know!

But I went off on a tangent again. Arkham Horror is a Lovecraftian board game franchise with many iterations and so much gorgeous artwork by many different artists! I enjoyed looking through all of the art in the book so much. I wish the book had more info on the artists or the game itself – I’m always starved for a little more text in artbooks – but on the other hand, it’s not like it’s a guide to the AH universe or anything, right? The art is the focus here. As for the text, there was an introduction and some flavor text accompanying the artwork. The size of the print though… who the hell thought it would be a good idea to use the tiniest print known to man?? Seriously, it’s so annoyingly small. And it looks downright comical in such a large book. I get that they probably didn’t want to draw attention away from the art, but if you’re going to put words on a page, I’d like to actually be able to read them without squinting or using a magnifying glass. I'm not even exaggerating. It's *that* fucking small.

The two artists I particularly enjoyed are Borja Pindado and Cristi Balanescu, but really, I should research more artists from this book.

I also found this post in praise of Arkham Horror 2e and I couldn't agree with it more! It's a nice in-depth analysis and they make some good points I didn't even think of.

Watching

I don’t usually watch reaction videos, but when The Algorithm brought me this video of two guys reacting to The Addams Family (1991), I immediately clicked watch and spent the next hour really enjoying myself. And when I discovered they had a reaction video to Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island I was SOLD! The Addams Family and Scooby-Doo are two of my favorite franchises, and I loved seeing people who aren't very familiar with them react so positively. I also watched the reactions to The Addams Family Values and Scooby-Doo and the Witch's Ghost. I'm yet to watch the other two Scooby reactions (Cyber Chase and Alien Invaders) but only because I want to rewatch the movies first.

I've also been watching season 5 of Taskmaster NZ on the Taskmaster Youtube channel. They drop one episode per week for international viewers and have been doing so whenever the original UK Taskmaster is between series. Really cool of them to make so many versions of Taskmaster available for free! I only wish they were a little better at adding subtitles. I'm really enjoying season 5, especially Abby Howells' autistic swag and her dynamic with Ben Hurley. My favorite season of TMNZ is still season 2 (to the shock of exactly no one), but season 5 is shaping up to be a close second.

I'm currently also in the middle of the second season of Why Women Kill. I've enjoyed both seasons, but it's so strange how different they are! Season 1 was an anthology with three different stories set in the same house but in different years. Narratively, the 1960s storyline was my favorite, but my heart belongs to the 1980s storyline with Lucy Liu. She was the main reason I started watching and I was devastated when I realized she won’t be in season 2. Her chemistry with Jack Davenport was INCREDIBLE! Best and most heartbreaking platonic duo ever. There was also the 2019 storyline – not my favorite, but still solid. The anthology format was a real strength of season 1 to me, with the house being the thread that tied the three stories together. For some reason, this concept was ditched and season 2 is set entirely in 1949. It’s a strange change, but I don’t mind it! I’m loving the campy fun and the lavish theatrics of both seasons. I also appreciate that all the episodes of s2 seem to have film noir titles. And Lana Parrilla’s in it!

Playing

First of all, I finally played the long-awaited Alex Hill: Whispers at White Oak Inn! It’s an adventure game inspired by the Nancy Drew PC games that came out earlier this year. This seems to be one of the first games made specifically by a fan of the Nancy Drew series that was directly inspired by it and sought to emulate the style of earlier games – or at least one of the first ones to generate a decent amount of excitement in the Nancy community way before its release.

I really enjoyed it! It’s about a private detective who comes to a small town to investigate threatening letters and a ghost that’s been appearing near a local inn. It’s such a clear love letter to our favorite game series, too! There are a lot of nostalgic things (bike riding! being able to look closely at places that have no plot relevance!), but also more mature themes that the Nancy games couldn’t include because they were kids’ games. I’ll write a bit more on this when I get to my annual best game roundup.

I needed to take my mind off things so the rest of the games I played recently have been point-and-click puzzlers. I played the third and final installment in the Nobodies series – Nobodies: Silent Blood. In this series you play as a cleaner for the government intelligence agency, disposing of bodies of the people they've killed and cleaning up the scene. The trick is to figure out how to dispose of a body and remember to leave the scene exactly as it was before the murder. I wouldn’t say these games are anything special, but they are good fun. This third game, though, I found to be the weakest in the trilogy.

Then I remembered seeing a new (and final) update to A Little to the Left, so I played the new levels they added. I’m a little sad that active development of this game is over, but I hope the devs treat us to a new exciting project soon.

Finally, I played Rusty Lake: Roots. The Rusty Lake universe is so strange and the lore seems so convoluted, but it compels me! I’ve seen the devs recommend a specific order of playing these games, starting with the Cube Escape games, but I didn’t know about any of that when I first played Rusty Lake: Hotel last year. I simply started in chronological order, with no idea Cube Escape games even existed. Anyway, I quite enjoy these strange little puzzles. I should add the Cube Escape games to my wishlist and catch up on what I’ve missed.